Players ask for proof of gender if you play a woman?

[Niblette]

Well I kind of think some of the other games are a lot less relationship focused then 3DX and more based on virtual prostitution. Its against the rules in 3DX to be a real prostitute and well gifts just aren't the same so prostitution in 3DX is only ever a RP thing.

[Tlaera]

A few more words for the original poster.

 

​There are different areas in the game, and people seem to be treated differently in them.  World Chat is frequently antagonistic, and I HAVE seen people demand proof of gender there.  But world chat is easily avoided/ignored and you don't miss out on anything by doing so.

 

​I've never had anyone demand or request proof of my gender.  And, frankly, anyone who would do so isn't worth your time.  There are a lot of people in this community, with the common range of trolls to saints, and a whole lot of normal people in between.  If anyone asks you for proof of your gender, just stop paying attention to him.  Or you can forcibly "ignore" him and he won't even show up on your screen anymore (nor will he be able to see you).  Chances are, if he's that kind of jerk, most everyone else has already ignored him anyway.

 

Tlaera 

[Briana]

Omg"! Not again. Let me prove you I'm a man .no, better saying trans or maybe Aliengender? wtf

[Briana]

This game must be splited in 2 category in the next update!:  New first category named 3DXchatRL for those who wanna play for real life met ,and the second new category gameplay named 3DXchatVR for those who even don't fucking care and wanna play for fun to be as they are in Virtuality, is that clear enough and easy to understand ?

[Perimede]

Doesn’t it all boil down to the fact that you are who you are and as people get to know you then your true self becomes revealed? Unless of course you role play, but role plays always seem very shallow to me. The problem is, as we’ve often seen here although less so now, that some people make out a woman is a bloke as a way of discrediting what they say. Even as a way of making them feel uncomfortable.

 

It suggest a kind of golden rule - get to know someone first before you commit to anything with them, yeah?

[Mar Mohan]

In all honesty who cares.  If they aren't hurting someone and are upfront, does it really matter no.  I've only been called a man by people who troll and say it to everyone.  I've never been asked to prove I'm a woman.  I've been on there a little over 3 years even with a long break, I came back and still wasn't asked.  I think it's how you act that makes a difference and people can see that from their own experience.

[Xandisweet]

All comes down to... it’s your choice if someone doesn’t like your answer then that’s their problem. Iggy works wonders

[Twiggy]

I think back to all the times I have seen where people have been found out to be a guy playing as a female and not letting people know, and here I mean they have not only played as a female they pretend to be a female in real life.

I think about the drama that has always happened around this, when people have been found out.

What I have noticed is a lot of the people that make comment in these forums and in the game on this subject saying that it doesn't matter are also people that have reacted strongly to these people that have been found out.

People say that it is just a game and that is true, but many of those same people will also say that what keeps them in the game is the friends they make.

From my experience, and going on what has been said in these forums when it has been brought up before, most times when you create these friendships real life comes into it.

We talk about experiences we have had and are having in our own lives with these people we have formed these friendships with, and for me anyway that did happen with most I became good friends with.

I think that is fairly common for that to happen, you give them that trust and being a female I would talk to females in the game about things I would do like in real life, and not talk about those things to the guys in the game.

For me there was to many times where these so called good friends I had given that trust to turned out to be a man making up stories about a real life where he was meant to be a female.

One in particular where I had been best friends with that person for 3 years.

 

What I found myself doing is something I feel has to be done to not have it effect you, which is to just not give that trust to any female in the game.

To accept that it is a far better chance that any female I was to make friends with is likely to be a man pretending to be female.

So my close friends in the game very much consisted of guys, in fact my friends list ended up having very few females.

What I then found is when those guys got together with a girl in the game the trust issue would effect things there.

I could not offer the type of friendship his girlfriend would look for from me.

 

We talk about this subject often in these forums, and yes I often get involved when a post is done on it.

People will say it doesn't matter, but will also react strongly when someone is found out.

People will say that the main thing that keeps them in the game is the friendships they have formed, but don't seem to see it gets hard to give that trust needed to form those friendships with females in the game.

 

For me large parts of the game were taken away, not only the trust in females to create friendships, but also when it came to things like just having conversations in group chats or in local chats.

I had to accept that most of the opinions given across in these conversations by the females in the game were mostly males pretending to be females.

So for me the game, and likely any other game on the Internet like it, just became not worth it.

[Briana]

[Rodin]

Thank you all very much for helping out a new member here ! 

[Camden]

I’ve been asked. Or if rejecting someone that whole thing thrown in my face as an insult. I was even told that my MCM, profile pics cast doubt upon me because they were men. Celebrity men whom I wanted to saddle but in any case... I found that I was being pressured due to paranoia and the so called “rumor” was likely spread by him to pressure me. Even went so far as to ask me questions about my cycle to glean if my answers were authentic. He still knows nothing of me. Those that do are those it took me a long time to reveal myself to. This world is full of pervs and you need to be safe and protect yourself.

 

After that terrible ordeal, if asked, they can fuck off. I used to be put off by women playing as men but now I wonder if as a woman she might fuck me better. I dunno.

[Briana]

3dxchat... The more it changes the more it's the samehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hkXHsK4AQPs

[Twiggy]

I’ve been asked. Or if rejecting someone that whole thing thrown in my face as an insult. I was even told that my MCM, profile pics cast doubt upon me because they were men. Celebrity men whom I wanted to saddle but in any case... I found that I was being pressured due to paranoia and the so called “rumor” was likely spread by him to pressure me. Even went so far as to ask me questions about my cycle to glean if my answers were authentic. He still knows nothing of me. Those that do are those it took me a long time to reveal myself to. This world is full of pervs and you need to be safe and protect yourself.

 

After that terrible ordeal, if asked, they can fuck off. I used to be put off by women playing as men but now I wonder if as a woman she might fuck me better. I dunno.

 

Yes throwing that in our faces seems to be a pretty common thing done, you piss someone off and they go telling people you are a guy, which is another problem we have to face because of all this.

I have had that happen to me to, mostly by one person in particular in these forums, even had question put over my pregnancy and me being a mother.

For a while, about 3 or 4 months I was asked fairly constantly, would meet someone claiming to be new and would go through a time of trying to help him with starting in the game.

Then he would lead it around to the how does he know I am actually a women in real life and start asking for me to prove it.

I am sure it was just one person making alts and playing a sick game, someone that knew that it bothered me.

But as I said before, I don't find the being asked to prove I am a female the biggest problem, it is all the other bs that happens around it.

At least half the drama I have seen in the game is directly related to guys playing as girls and not telling people.

A large amount of the dis trust in the game can be attributed to it.

It effects how new players are welcomed into the game and has a lot to do with people sticking to their own little groups.

But in the end I could see that there were so many in the game that insist it makes no difference and shouldn't matter that it became pointless to stay.

To me, and a lot of other people it does matter, but like me those people end up staying away.

[Perimede]

Twiggy's right, it does matter. If people fail to accept you for who you are, it's irritating. If people go out of their way to spread rumours and undermine who you are then that is something a bit more. It not only damages your credibility with people who know you but can also undermine your self confidence. That is why the rumour mongers do it. It certainly makes you think twice about renewing your sub.

 

To my mind the key reason people stay with the game is the friendships they have made. Undermining trust between people can cause these friendships to fail ........................ no need for me to say more.

[☙𝔼𝕩❧]

Twiggy's right, it does matter. If people fail to accept you for who you are, it's irritating. If people go out of their way to spread rumours and undermine who you are then that is something a bit more. It not only damages your credibility with people who know you but can also undermine your self confidence. That is why the rumour mongers do it. It certainly makes you think twice about renewing your sub.

 

To my mind the key reason people stay with the game is the friendships they have made. Undermining trust between people can cause these friendships to fail ........................ no need for me to say more.

If you have your true friends it is impossible. Or they are not so true.

[Perimede]

Pretty much what I was saying - if you must apply Occam's Razor :-) It doesn't stop it being hurtful when people you have considered friends stuff you up.

[Lux Interior]

At least half the drama I have seen in the game is directly related to guys playing as girls and not telling people.

A large amount of the dis trust in the game can be attributed to it.

It effects how new players are welcomed into the game and has a lot to do with people sticking to their own little groups.

But in the end I could see that there were so many in the game that insist it makes no difference and shouldn't matter that it became pointless to stay.

To me, and a lot of other people it does matter, but like me those people end up staying away.

 

 

Agree 100%.

[Niblette]

Well I think that it depends on what we are talking about I personally don't think that the blame for people who are bullying others over who they are in real life and I am not just talking about accusing people of playing as another gender I have seen people make comments about someone being ugly or the job they have and stuff like that as well, should be shifted away from them. They are the ones who are creating the hostile environment with their toxic hyper masculinity or by supporting the patriarchal order that exist within 3DX. I also find that at times I am attracted to guys like that but they are really the issue and not enough is done to confront them especially in WC which they have largely overrun. At the end of the day all of us male and female should work together to make this a friendlier place. If we cant do it here in a game how can we ever accomplish it in the real world?

[☙𝔼𝕩❧]

Pretty much what I was saying - if you must apply Occam's Razor :-) It doesn't stop it being hurtful when people you have considered friends stuff you up.

I'm not a big fan of Occam's razor and didn't see the analogy. My friends can`t hurt me cuz they are my friends. Other bad persons don't interest me and will be ignored if something wrong.

Maybe I bad understand you. sorry then  : ) 

[Tlaera]

Twiggy, I recognize that you've been hurt.  Those feelings and pain are real, and I don't want to suggest in any way that they're not.  I'm sorry for the things that happened to you.  

 

But I have a different perspective on this.  

 

Imagine if you met someone in the game, and she was kind and enjoyable and supportive.  And, imagine if something about her was untrue. 

Either:

1) She was actually a kind and enjoyable and supportive male.  

Or

2) She was really a female, but is actually vindictive and duplicitous and is pretending to be your friend so that she can laugh about you behind your back with her real friends.

 

Obviously it would be better if she were truly who she said she was, but given either of those choices, 1 is the far better one in my opinion.

 

My friends in 3DXChat are kind and enjoyable and supportive.  I cherish that about them.  None of them have turned out to be male (yet?) but in my heart I feel that, so long as they really are the kind, enjoyable, and supportive people that I enjoy spending time with, it wouldn't matter.  There are a lot of good and valid reasons for people to obscure truths about themselves.  The male could be gender questioning.  Or he could have female emotions that he can't show to his male friends and coworkers and needs to play here to be his real self.  And, even if the gender is true, there could be other untruths that should be equivalent.  For instance, the real female you're playing with could actually be hetero.

 

The important thing is that, if the person you're playing with really is kind and enjoyable and supportive, then he's not hiding his gender to hurt you.  That should count for something.  Maybe it should count for everything.

 

Of course, there's a major caveat to this.  If you're intending to meet your 3DXChat friends in person, fall in love, get married, etc, then obviously you need to know their real genders.  But for many of us, there is no possibility of an in person meeting.  For instance, I'm happily married.  I strictly separate my online friends from my real life family. 

 

So, if all of my 3DXChat friends turned out to be male, nothing would change for me.  So long as the things about them that really matter, their kindness, etc, are true, then I'm happy.

 

Tlaera

[AllisonStarlove]

In this digital age you cannot be sure of anything on the internet, you can post any picture you want. Does not mean its you.. Contact voice via Skype or other VOIP? Not any proof either..Since I know for a fact that you can get a piece of software cheap that allows anything transmitted via a microphone to transmute you voice into anything male,female,alien,robot or just plain distorted. If people don't believe you are who you say you are...WHO CARES! Ignore them and get on with life. I know quite a few here in the forums (not mentioning names) that think myself and my wife are figments of some males imagination. Thinking is free in the world..at least for the time being.

[Lux Interior]

Tlaera,

The person I consider my best friend here is a CD playing as a woman and it plainly written on his profile.

I have nothing but respect and friendly love for my dear Vicky.

Sitll, I have my doubts about kindness and supportivness by men who deliberately decided to lie and decieve the moment they made fem avi and the decision to hide themsleves behind them.

So tell me Tlaera, why they don't write fem avi = male operator in their profiles? Many men do that, but they don't.

I'll tell you..most of them just toy with ppl, play with their emotions and are having a big fun doing that. That's what a majority of them do, and that's why that woman who opened the topic was asked to show the proof.

Many ppl have been burned before in 3DX, and you know the saying once bitten, twice shy.

Take for example that man who wrote that pathetic confession saying he is a mentally disturbed man who played a woman and that he is sorry about all that lying. He promised that he will never play a fem avi again and people believed him and gave him support. Guess what?Here he is on another fem avi..now a fake lesbian.
Yes...cetrainly there are men who can be great and freindly fem avis, but majority of them is here to get laid with someone and toy with that person. That's the reality.

[Xandisweet]

Tlaera,

The person I consider my best friend here is a CD playing as a woman and it plainly written on his profile.

I have nothing but respect and friendly love for my dear Vicky.

Sitll, I have my doubts about kindness and supportivness by men who deliberately decided to lie and decieve the moment they made fem avi and the decision to hide themsleves behind them.

So tell me Tlaera, why they don't write fem avi = male operator in their profiles? Many men do that, but they don't.

I'll tell you..most of them just toy with ppl, play with their emotions and are having a big fun doing that. That's what a majority of them do, and that's why that woman who opened the topic was asked to show the proof.

Many ppl have been burned before in 3DX, and you know the saying once bitten, twice shy.

Take for example that man who wrote that pathetic confession saying he is a mentally disturbed man who played a woman and that he is sorry about all that lying. He promised that he will never play a fem avi again and people believed him and gave him support. Guess what?Here he is on another fem avi..now a fake lesbian.

Yes...cetrainly there are men who can be great and freindly fem avis, but majority of them is here to get laid with someone and toy with that person. That's the reality.

Well said, Lux. Both perspectives laid out.

[Niblette]

I am not going to defeat anyone who does what your saying but I think that its an issue that goes beyond just males playing as female. There are plenty of people who lead people on and then are married in RL or in a relationship in RL it happens all the time. I don't want to be mean but its questionable in my mind if people who are married in RL should even be here and getting into relationships. 

[Lux Interior]

Many things are questionable here, but the topic is about a woman asked to show the proof of her gender.

There is a reason for that. Many ppl enter this game in good faith, but the game itself makes them doubt anything and anyone.

I really can't blame those ppl. I never asked anyone for proof, but I don't have any doubts about that fact the majority of fem avis here are men.

That's why I play only with my dearest friends and really rarely send a PM to an unknown fem avi.

I have been toyed with once and that was enough for me.