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Bacon Priest

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  1. Did some massive DoS attack start on 5/9/20 at about 8:30 pm Eastern?
  2. Is there some sort of massive DNS thing going on that started around 830 tonight?
  3. It is distressing to see people like Rollie blaming the current server problems on the developers when he must know that many if not most of the people here reject Bacon as their Lord, Savior and primary source of nutrition. In a land where the Wisdom of the Swine is widely reject can any one truly be surprised that there are server problems?
  4. There is always a trap in forcing people to live in a way that is not in accordance with their nature. Homosexuals that are forced to attend re-education camps to pray the gay away have one of the highest rates of suicide of any group. So too it is with people who are deprived of bacon or the word of the swine. Perhaps it is the same with you and your shenanigans. What we can know for sure is that we must seek an existence that is harmonious and holistic with our nature rather than fighting against it.
  5. I am not one for long goodbyes so I will just add these few words and then try and resist the temptation to reply further. Hamlet Act III Scene I that you quote from is generally thought of as being played in a state of anger or even rage pacing back and forth at the front of a well lit stage yelling at the audience. I am reminded how ever that Richard Burton is commonly thought to have won his knighthood for his portrayal of Hamlet sitting on the floor in dim lighting whimpering the lines. When I look at my time among you preaching the wisdom of the swine, this latter portal seems the most apt; hence Kierkegaard. You offer me one quote from The Bard, let me offer you another. Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow, Creeps in this petty pace from day to day, To the last syllable of recorded time; And all our yesterdays have lighted fools The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player, That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more. It is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.
  6. “And when the bacon has run out, the bacon of temporality, when the noise and fuss of the Green Berry has grown silent and its restless or ineffectual activism has come to an end, when everything around you is still, as it is in the eternity, then eternity asks you and every individual in these millions and millions about only one thing: whether you have lived in despair or not.” — Soren Kierkegaard, “The Sickness Unto Death”
  7. We all knew this day would come. Four years ago I came here after the Bacon Rapture. Since then, I have been your guide on this long strange journey toward the Wisdom of the Swine. It has not been easy. We have fought the Green Berry and its wickedness. We have stood shoulder to shoulder and drawn strength from each other but that is at an end. Recently, the fight has become harder. Now, the mere singing of Dance Piggy is seen as spam. Now one can not raise one's voice and speak the truth. I fear that if I stay it will be at the cost of pretending to be something I am not. I fear that what I have done in the past will not be seen as an inspiration for the future but rather forgotten in favor of more politically correct and recent behavior. I very much like my legacy as it is and this is why I must leave. I expect I will never see most of you again. I have grown fond of many of you and I will be looking for you at your time of salvation. While the road before you may be hard and long know that whenever you eat an all pork hot dog I will be watching you. Whenever you put bacon in the brine tube my hand will be their right beside yours. I have done my best for each of you and now you must walk alone. The Lawn Tractor.
  8. Listening to RobT talk about bacon is a lot like listening to Edward G. Robinson talk about the Exodus.... "Where is your bacon now eh?? Where is your bacon now??" Don't be surprised when you see people who cant quote a single verse from the Book of Swine opposing bacon. Dont be surprised when see people like Yalun that refused to tell us his address so that we could send him several baconators and a frosty oppose what we have long tried to accomplish.
  9. Four years ago the Bacon Rapture came and took the faithful. I arrived shortly after to guide those that remained though the end times. Since then you have been granted signs that the end times were here. You have seen the appearance of Yalun and of Green Berry Fever. You have seen seen the election of Donald Trump. Yet few among you have devoted yourself to Bacon. Few among you have a working understanding of the Book of Swine. Few among you know the true message behind the Festival of Lubricants. Instead many of you focus on the minor differences between Canadian and American bacon. Many of you spam word chat though it be written "Bacon is not Spam" - Book of Swine (1:1) Now, unexpectedly your world has come to an end. You can not walk or talk. You can not fuck. You seek external explanations for this such as a DOS attack but I say this: Look at yourselves and your relationship with bacon for there you will find the true source of your predicament.
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