Do you like being hugged by random strangers in game?

[Perimede]

Hug and kiss becoming a request would sort out two of the irritations and would deal with the people who do it to be nasty. So worth suggesting formally. And it would only inconvenience those who do it to be nasty - the noobs will soon cotton on.

[TheTruth3dx]

Malicious hugs of the evil-doers are the worst kind of hugs. Truth.

[Perimede]

Maybe I should repeat, again, that the random hug in itself isn't the problem. The vast majority of people who do it, do it because they don't realise it is annoying and apologise immediately when you say. It is the odd one or two who think it is their right to randomly hug, kiss or whatever you, irrespective of what you want that are the problem and turn the minor irritation into something much more serious. The iggie is reactive. The best idea we've had yet is to make hugging and kissing something you give permission for. The code is there in the game to do it with invites, dance etc.so shouldn't be too difficult to implement and would deal with a lot of less serious stuff at a stroke.

 

Nobody has any right to hug, kiss, wank over anybody who doesn't want it to happen to them, even in a game. That is the fundamental point on this one.

 

When it comes to more serious stuff like the rumour mongers, mind messers and so on then what they do is clearly wrong. It becomes more complicated, hence my involving myself in the other threads where we can dicuss that without interfering with the less complicated stuff. I think it worth trying to separate out the two types of problem.

 

I am not happy about the way some people appear to be making light of this. As I say it's not the majority of them, who don't know any better. It's a minority who turn it into an issue.

[Xandisweet]

Quit callin people who disagree with you minorities. Some just don’t want your drama. It’s gone on long enough. You’ve stated your points... repeatedly in several threads derailing each and making it about you. Be happy for the positive things and try to make light of the negative or else you’ll be stuck in this never ending grudge driven loop.

[TheTruth3dx]

Hopefully the pot is green. Truth.

[TheTruth3dx]

 

I am not happy about the way some people appear to be making light of this. As I say it's not the majority of them, who don't know any better. It's a minority who turn it into an issue.

 

The vast majority of us do not exist on forums to make you happy. Truth.

[Perimede]

lets break this down ....

 

1- you complain about alts and also men pretending to be female yet you have or had countless alts and a male one - who complains about this? - I've said many times that mosty of the time it doesn't matter. I did say, however, that men playing as women in game can distort some people's expectations of what women want from the game.

 

2- you complain about people trolling yet just about half of  every thread made that has constant bickering in it has been ones you started. - I try always to be polite and base my arguments on something with a bit of foundation. I'm not perfect but I think I succeed far better than some round here. I never, ever deliberately attack or demean people. I do, when I am attacked, fight back. For example, your making light of a majority of people's dislike of random hugs shows quite a lot about you, and not a lot about the people who don't like them. I don't troll, I raise things that interest me, it is people like you who deliberately misundestand what people say and make big drama out of it.  Remember when I raised the idea that there are far more men than women playing 3dxChat, you'd have thought that I'd committed blasphemy.  Yet you base a lot of your arguments on just that idea. Note here, most people don't like random hugs, yet here you have been trying to make light of it. Everybody has the right to control what happens to them, both in the real world and in the virtual one. The fact that 3dxChat is a sex game doesn't give permission to assume that anybody wants a shag at any time.

 

3- you complain about forum alts yet you are on a alt right now!  - We've been here before.- There's just me, Perimede, on the forums and just Ciera and Pandora in game. Anyway it is one of your strategies to try to demean and discredit people to always say they're alts. Remember when you accused Desi of being me, remember when you (sorry that was Intercessional) said TamsinUK, I think, was me when she posted while I was high in the sky travelling to Poland with my husband sitting right next to me. In that case you pushed it to the point I had to present the BA policy on use of mobile equipment, because you refused to see it. People who use a number of forum alts to try to make out their opinion is the dominant  is not terribley clever. Anyway it's you who makes the big issue abotu forum alts by frequently accusing people of being alts. Most people aren't really that fussed providing the alt discusses the topic and isn't used to demean, intimidate or cause offence.

 

In closing im going to mention a pot and a kettle, guess what color they are? - I think that confiurms what I've just said.

 

So to close - I believe it is you and your friends who make the forums look bad because you think it fun. Well it isn't fun and I think people are geting fed up of it again. I believe that sooner or later action will be taken. I welcome that time.

 

What I think we want from the forums is lively interesting discussion, a few games and a chance for decent two way communication between us, the users, and the devs. The trolling does nothing to promote this and presents the game in a very negative light. Yes there are issues - but sweeping them under the carpet is not clever. Accepting them and addressing them will help improve the game. Remember my anology to teh issue of workplace and in school bullying. It happens, ignoring it doesn't make it go away.

[Perimede]

27 to 5 at the moment. Still a wider gap than I expected when I launched this little poll. I think it safe to say that most people don't aprticularly like being hugged by random strangers in game. Later today, if I get time, I'll pop a note off to Gizmo and make a suggestion that the permission thing is included in the code for hugs and kisses. It'll then be up to him to decide if he wants to pick up on it or not. If he does then it'll get rid of a few very common annoyances.

[TheTruth3dx]

 I never, ever deliberately attack or demean people.

 

You implied that MarMohan was not female because she does not agree with your views. Truth.

[Mar Mohan]

I'm not going to comment fully with your reply to Rob as I'll be having my wine later but I do ask you go back over your posts and rethink what you've said about not I never, ever deliberately attack or demean people. I do, when I am attacked, fight back.   I've not done that to you but you have to me as I don't have a reason to attack anyone.  No one said that the random hugging isn't a pain in the ass because it can be.  Some are thinking you're blowing this way out of proportion because you bring everything you want to say to every thread like the polls, hugs and such then people have to try to piece it all together.  You want something done keep the line of thinking that's based on the thread itself.

Here is what IMVU does for their VIPs (this is an additional fee for users) so when someone does something that they can't do, a hand goes up stopping them and they look like they're running in place:
https://gyazo.com/729e3fea8f2130994d85694a3eefe5e5

https://gyazo.com/0b6a4f38bb2716dd3c2ba8539dfb57f7

https://gyazo.com/0cb0beaa1a5562eb82c4aae372ef940a

https://gyazo.com/120a757dfe762d6f687ea8845811cf3e

https://gyazo.com/94ae6f64eea607f696b803a7c06d1777

 

I'll message Gizmo and ask him if he'd like to see what all of this looks like within IMVU so he can see first hand what I'm talking about.  I'll even meet him on there to show him all around so he gets an idea of IMVU and maybe he'll get some ideas.  Do realize that IMVU has been out a long time and has a larger amount of users to their game verses here.  I've been on IMVU since it was beta.

[Perimede]

You implied that MarMohan was not female because she does not agree with your views. Truth.

REALly!

 

I’ll leave that there because if the thread involved hadn’t been trashed and deleted then my comment would make sense. In any case Mar said in the diary section that it was time to move on from there. And it is.

[Perimede]

Just to close this off - i’ve Asked Gizmo to lock this thread now and suggested putting the accept/decline button on hugs and kisses. His decision, though.

 

Just thanks to those people who took this in the spirit intended.

[Xandisweet]

Stop saying majority you clearly don’t know the meaning of that word. This is not based on accurate questioning. “No I don’t like strangers hugging me” vs “oh god yesssss hug me, bb” people come in, read your crap and gtfo.

[Xandisweet]

Should be a poll asking “do you enjoy when people make complaints just for the sake of a fight” a. Yes b. No or c. I’m just here for the sex and random hugs

[Mar Mohan]

http://3dxforum.com/index.php?/topic/7031-our-sweet-and-problematic-alts-techsolution/?p=288121

That is what TheTruth3dx is talking about. It wasn't about something in a deleted thread.  I had given my reply to that post.

[Perimede]

Oh ..... my ...... god! That’s totally bonkers. I said that ‘as a woman you’d understand ...........’ The assumption being that you’re ...... oh whatever! Back to enjoying working under my tree in the garden.

[Mar Mohan]

Oh ..... my ...... god! That’s totally bonkers. I said that ‘as a woman you’d understand ...........’ The assumption being that you’re ...... oh whatever! Back to enjoying working under my tree in the garden.

Perimede

Posted 22 June 2018 - 06:02 PM

@Mar_Mohan - random hugging is not a good approach to a woman you fancy but don't know reasonably well. As a woman you should recognise this. The fact you don't appear to confirms things I surmise and won't express in public although maybe to close friends who won't take it out of context.

 

That is what you wrote.  I've been PM'ed in game asking why you were calling me a man.  What exactly did you mean by that because anyone that's read it so far took it as you calling me a man but wouldn't say it here but to your close friends who won't take it out of context.  You're even questioning me in the last post you've done.

 

I've not called anyone any other sex and won't.  You've been called out a couple of times for doing that to me and act like you don't have a clue what they're talking about.  That right there is your post and it clearly shows your surmising I am.  As a woman no I'm not offended when someone hugs me in game unless they repeatedly do it and I've asked them to stop but that rarely happens to me same for kissing of the cheek.

[Perimede]

Shall we just let people make up their own minds, yeah. You really are beyond the pale, sometimes.

[Mar Mohan]

Shall we just let people make up their own minds, yeah. You really are beyond the pale, sometimes.

Thanks for the laugh, I know my skin is but by the end of summer I have a very nice tan.  I'll be enjoying my wine later by my hot tub.  Feel free to check out my profile on here I'll be updating the link to add in the new picture I'll take and it'll show my lovely neck scar as well.

[Perimede]

Shall I explain in words of as few syllables as is possible?

 

'You' as in a brit turn of phrase for people generally  - but that doesn't suit your agenda, does it? Anyway you may fancy a woman. Nothing wrong with that.

 

The operative bit is 'As a woman you'd understand ................................' So stop deliberately misunderstanding what people say and read things in context, it all becomes clear then.

 

I couldn't give a monkey's fuck whether you're a woman, bloke or green boggle eyed monster from Alpha Centauri - it's what people say that's important on these forums, not who they might be or who anybody pretends to be. So if you talk sense and take the trouble to understand what people are saying and try to reply sensibley then it doesn't matter one iota whether you're an alt or not. I could say that is a truth, but it's not really.

[Xandisweet]

Why aren’t this bully’s threads locked? Something needs to be done about this...

[Mar Mohan]

I replied to your comment as it was directed at me not the general population.  I fully understand what people say and give an opinion even if it doesn't match theirs.  With regards to my sex, I am a woman, I fancy men as I'm a heterosexual and now several times you've surmised otherwise.  When I have people who've read your comments come to me and ask why that's being said when they know I'm a woman. I am not the only one reading this and asking so clearly it's being understood what you're saying.

 

I'm going to walk away from this and send Gizmo a message asking to please review this thread and the others.

[Perimede]

Do as you think fit, I like to think most people understand what I am saying. I'm confident I haven't said anything offensive.

 

What does concern me is that you appear support borderline misogyny, when people make light of concerns that I, and other women, have raised on the forum. I find that very difficult.

 

Behind this thread, and the section of my other one relating to it, is the idea that we all have the right to decide what happens to us, whether it be in game or in rl. The fact 3dxChat is a game doesn't change this basic idea at all. I  don't see that as contentious in any way. In fact I'd like to see a convincing argument against it. The offensive bit occurs when people think they do have right to dictate to other people what happens to them and continue regardless. That is what I get cross about.

[Mar Mohan]

Reported that's how I'm leaving it.

http://3dxforum.com/index.php?/topic/7031-our-sweet-and-problematic-alts-techsolution/?p=288014