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Carnival of souls


Nicci

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I have met many very cool people here and made some very dear friends , whom I love very much. I have also had some pretty bad experiences and bad relationships, and have found myself jaded by them. I find it harder and harder to let people in to my life here (not my real life but my game life) People I don't yet know  will start conversations with me and most of the time I just have no interest in taking to them or getting to know them. I used to very much enjoy meeting and getting to know new friends, but I find my trust in people lacking and my circle of friends slowly shrinking

 

Been in this funk for several months and it is starting to bother me, maybe I'll be able to finally be able to punch my way out of this paper bag after putting these thoughts on paper(so to speak) maybe not

 

this may not really be a diary just some random thoughts but i may write more in time

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I can fully understand your situation, as even in the shorter time I am here, I have been annoyed quite often. The only bad thing is, that you let Impact these people / events your vitality, as you are starting to resignate. Sometimes it seems like a piece of hard work to keep vitality inside here, and I ask myself why I am still here. And in the end the possibility of meeting new people is one aspect that keeps me here as well. I hope you find a way to break this barrier. If you meet me in game, feel free to pm me and have a longer chat on that or any other topic.

 

This game is for fun!

Zokora

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Hey Nicci,I agree, and many have had similar experiences in here like Yours, I myself have been through the same Experience or my last three plus years being in game. . This place has the same ups and downs here like the real world, but I have learned to ignore the Dram, and not take it all to serious. The best way to take this place is it is A game , have fun, and don't not talk to new people some are good, not all bad, the more you just go with the flow in game, the better it gets. ..Just my ideas..And if I see you in game I will say hello..))

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Even if I may not be as long in the game as you, I perfectly understand your point. However, I'd like to put some focus on the "other side" of this, too.

 

From a newcomer's perspective (which I probably not am anymore), you soon find out that it can be difficult having a good conversation with "regulars", no matter how inviting their profile may be, because they can be quite repellent. You cannot generalize, of course, but this is something that can be quite frustrating for "the other side" as well :) So potentially both sides lose something ...

 

And on the other hand again, I also feel that I'm becoming a bit tired and of course less enthusiastic than I was in the beginning, but to a certain degree that's even a bit convenient, because I've already met so many interesting (or lets better say crazy) people here :D

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  • 5 weeks later...

It's been about a month and I haven't written anything here mostly because things have been fairly good lately, until now.The past has come back to haunt me yet again. My Ex in the game ( I will not use names) did some really awful things to me towards the end of our relationship, told other people some deeply personal and privately painful things that I had confided in her about  and had those people use these things to try to hurt me  all the while blaming others for the harassment that was occurring.( not the first time she has played sick games with people here  I have learned)  then she just disappeared... POOF  gone. which was a blessing in more ways than one, peace was made and the harassment stopped. Something else wonderful happened but that is another story

 

So months go by and low and behold  there she is, new name new face exact same profile. Ran from me whenever i entered the same room, I never pursued her or tried to make her talk to me, I just let her be. but she can't seem to let things be, she has started to insinuate herself into my friends lives ( even ones she hated ) without telling them who she is / was and wasn't really responsive to those friends who knew who she was. Until now 

 

I will admit  I have difficulty some times making friends, I am often Guarded and closed off. partly  that is just how I am and partly because of things that have happened here. There is one person that I consider to be my closest friend in the game, it is / was a true friendship, no sex involved  just wonderful company and fun times  and talks. Her private life here has always been her own I have never stuck my nose in it, so to speak , other than to be there for her when things aren't going well and when they are going very well. this friend approached my ex to ask her why he had been hanging on the periphery of our group for a few nights and my ex told her it wasn't intentional and she would keep her distance.    ( bullshit )( cough ) 

 

Now just the other day my friend,yes the one I wrote about above  tells me that my ex asked her to be her Domme, something something sad and lonely  my friend asked if it was ok with me, which it was not and is not, I know that may be very wrong on my part but it just isn't  ok.. and it did hurt that my friend thought it would be ok. There are 500 + people here she can fuck yet she keeps trying to get with my friends when she knows how it would make me feel. It has fractured my friendship with one of  ( I thought )  the truly good people here and a very very dear friend.  

 

very sad and discouraged again ......

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