David

Courage for me is to look into the black void, to know deep inside that nobody is looking at me, nobody cares, nobody is giving any presents, not now and not in the afterlife, and still do the right thing.

I will try to give you a simple and direct answer. Culturally speaking, Women are inferior to man. Man is the model, the right example, the one that created by god. Women considered to be less than man in most cultures. Women had to fight for their rights to dirve a car, to vote, to join the army or to go to univrsity. in all those fights, the main argue against womens rights were that women are not good as men, they just cant do it. As men, we always live in fear of being reduced to the level of woman. In ancient greece, were homosexuality was so accepted, it was always done between older man and young man. the older had to penetrate. If he was penetrated, it was a major humiliation. In hebrew, the word for a female, is simply the female word for a hole. Yes. Female is a hole.And this is why the greeks were so humiliated when another man pentrated them. He used them as a hole. He turned them into a woman. I belive that when a man is trying to make a sexual advance on me, it triggers the fear of being reduced to a female level. I think I have one staus (male) and here comes this guy and thinks I have a different status (female). This is the thing that makes me flinch. The fear of losing social status, and be stigmatised as lower in the social chain. I noticed some people here find it hard to understand some of the things I write, so let me say in advance. I dont think women are lesser than man, I dont think there is anything a man can do and a woman cant (except scratching her balls). I only stated the current caltural world we all live in. And if we try hard enough we can change it. Peace.

I would like to reffer to Bran's and Caylix's posts and tell about two incidents that happened to me. The first one accured when me and my best friend (male) went to visit the University which later on I attended too. A gay man was openly hitting on my friend there, doing it in the most charming and pushy way he could. He was very nice but kept perssuing even after my friend told him he wasnt into man. He wasnt rude or anything, but a bit disrespectful, as I would leave a girl alone if she told me she was gay. That didnt make me feel uncomfortable nor did my friend felt like that. We took it as a nice gesture and Im sure my friend felt complimented. The second incident involves me, as I was hit by a gay man at my work place. He was a customer, and after finishing his purches, he stayed and started complimenting me. I was quite busy and it took me a while to understand he is hitting on me. When I realized what he is doing, I felt shcocked. I felt like somehow my masculinity was challenged (Yes I said it...). I felt he even considering me being gay was some sort of insult. I didnt feel complimented at all. I was rather rude, and moved to a place with more people so he couldnt talk to me in privete anymore. He understood and left. To conclude those two stories, I would like to say I agree with Bran and Caylix... Sociaity sucks big time.

I think it all comes down to question of ownership. When we are in a relation, monogamist relation, we precive the partner as part of our possesion, and thus expecting him to act in sort of ways, telling us the truth, not sleeping with others etc. This is ofcourse an illusion. Like all possesion its not real. much like a piece of paper, with all the right signs, stating a piece of land is mine, doesnt make that piece of land really mine. i can use it, build on it or sell it. Someone can change the laws tomorrow and I will lose all those privliges I had on that piece of land. anything changed in the world? I dont think so. That piece of land never was mine. same goes for all ownerships. Including those coming with a relation. but. we are only humans. I can talk for myself, knowing that this ownership is an illusion and yet I cant let it go. I will keep that illusion. I cant see myself knowing my partner being with others and not feeling hurt. And I think the sad truth is, most poly relations dont come from giving up the illusion place. I think for most of them, one side is more "interested" in poly relation, and one side just accept it as he wants to keep the relation going. But thats just me. Dont mind me. Have a nice day.

Some thought to share about this topic For those of you who don't know me, I used to play female avatar called KitCat. I played it for almost a month. I think I was very good at it, and managed to fool almost everyone. And yes, that includes sexual interactions with girls. I didnt try sexual interactions with the boys, so maybe they would have cought me if I did, but im not attracted to the male genitalia. Now lets get on to the imprtant stuff. The reason which made me play female. I must say I tried several avatars when I just started playing 3DXChat. some of them were males and some females. I felt more comofortable playing female. I still do. For those of us who try to interact with others in 3DXChat world, and I mean meaningfull interactions, as one might suggest that cold invitation and mute intercorse are also ways of interaction, but im not talking about those ways. Im talking about conversation, both in pms and in public chat, about all sort of topics, not just sex, social interactions as we experiance them irl. In those interactions, I felt more free to be myself, while playing female avatar. let me give you an example. One of the days we were a group of 7 on the beach. 5 girls and 2 guys, one of them was semi afk. Im counting myself as one of the girls. We were having lots of fun, and all the girls were dancing in a cricle around the guy who wasnt afk. At one point one of the girls crashed. after a few minutes she came back. and crashed again. I said its not fair, and we should protest against the server kicking her. I sugested that we all take off our bikini tops as protest. now imagine the whole situation but with me as a male there. I couldnt be dancing in a circle around the guy, couldnt I? How would you interpurt my sugestion to take off our bikini top, had it been said by a man? knowing I have a libido and sexual drive, seeing the girls as potential partners? just think about it. We all take our interactions experiance from rl and use it here on 3DXChat world. There is no escape from it. And we all treat males and females differently. And im not talking about discrimination here. Im talking about basic expectations we have for proper conduct from each gender. Thus if I played male avatar on the example I gave, I would have missed the fun. You can say I had a chance to get a different kind of fun. But this is disrespectful. I know myself good enough to decide what kind of fun I like. And if you think my fun comes from cheating the girls to take off their clothes... for all I care you can stop reading now, cos obviously Im not getting through to you. I remember kindergarden. At that early age of 4 and 5 we already were devided to gender groups, crated by sociaty and not by the teacher. The division was not complete so I got to "cross the lines" occasionaly. My personal experiance from that was profound. The boys where pushing, shoving, shouting, and competing. The girls were quiete, laughing, helping and sharing. Im not ashamed to say I liked playing with the girls more than I enjoyed playing with the boys. I still do. I think this experiance can help shed more light on my playing female decision. Now I play male avatar. I miss playing female. In most part, girls precived to be more communicative than males. They have to be that way, since solving conflicts using raw power is hardly an option for them. So they communicate themselvs out of conflicts. Being the communicative person that I am, I can totaly relate to that. and this is why I miss playing a female. Not to mention all the pretty clothes they have... There is one thing im not missing. That is lying to my friends. It was never comfortable for me. I dont like to lie and Im trying not to lie at all when I dont have to. My reason is simple: there are many lies but only one truth. Its so much easyer to remember the truth, than many lies told to different people. Lying here wasnt hard in that sense, since I told the same lie to many people. But it was still a lie, and I feel better, now that I dont have to lie. I think this is all I had to say, but feel free to ask me here or ingame any question. Worse thing I will not answer it. Have a nice day.