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Game Etiquette for chatting and flirting - your opinion


Freezer

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Something that I have observed in the past few days and I would like your opinion on.

 

After chatting and flirting with somebody for some length of time, say 1/2 hours to one hour you are starting to like the person.

You are getting to like him/her and get the feeling that he/she could be a good friend to have in your list.

You even ask to dance or for a flirty kiss.  He/she may play hard to get but does not totally rejects your flirting but plays along.

 

Suddenly another player steps in and without saying a word the player you have been chatting with starts to dance or leaves with the new person.

 

Is this normal and acceptable in this game?

 

Should we expect at least something like the following:

 

 

-My dearest friend jus arrived and I would like to spend sometime with him/her.

 

or

 

-Sorry I really do not want to chat with you anymore, you are boring and your flirting sucks, I had to call somebody to rescue me.

 

or (from the start)

 

-I am expecting somebody, we can chat a little but then I will have to leave.

 

or

 

Well, you get the idea.

 

 

Needles to say that player is not going to make my friends list, but that is just me.

 

 

Your comments and opinion is greatly appreciated.

 

 

 

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Hey Freezer,

 

Unfortunately Macca is right. :(  Although I am in the 20% that will excuse myself appropriately, as you know, and apologize. I think it is rude to just leave during a convo or anything. Even if you think the person is boring, at least say, "I am sorry but I have to go" or something. There is no need to be rude to people. This is not to say in the past I have not been an ass and left, but it was situational, generally I have good manners and will excuse myself.

 

Anyways that is just my 2 bits.

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Well, maybe it's also that you have to capt attention from others. If you start to bother them, maybe they will just decide to move or something like that...? (Not saying you are borring)

But I aggree that it seems hard for new player to make good friends at the beginning..

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Or on other option:

 

there is a girl, let you chat with him for hours, maybe make a sex, then you think you are the world's biggest lovers, you wrote in your profile, that your heart belongs to that girl, giving her gifts, stalking after her all day, and you completly ruined her freedom.

 

 

my advice: chat for only 5-10 min, and if nothing humorous or nasty coming out from it, move on. but I'm not here for love, so it's just my opinion.

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Folks are here for different reasons and one can only hope good manners prevail..

 

Given that getting a cordial heads up before someone leaves to join someone else or goes poof may not happen, i would put it into context that the game offers anonymity and well. no consequence for rudeness.

 

Hate to say treat interactions unless you know the person, as one where they might leave  ..for their own reasons.....i regulary chat with you and you know I think you are a delight my friend.

 

Their loss :D

Onward and upward....

 

hugs

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Freezer.. And this is just my opinion.. The only people that will have sex after 5-10 minutes of chatting are the guys with female avis (not all the guys may I add).

 

Wiazrd has made it plainly clear in other posts he isn't an advocate of friendships and relationships here. So if you are happy to have sex with just guys, follow his advice. If you would rather have sex with girls, make good friends etc.. listen to the rest of us :)

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I find that this is very rude to act like this . Even I , lesbian , i sometimes dance with men ( warning them from the start that there is 0,0001% of chances to have a kiss from me :) ) , and if one of my sexy friends come to dance with me or more , i take the time to tell the man that i need to leave .

 

So straight women , an advice , take the time to say goodbye , after all , even men are humans behind their screen  :D 

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Freezer.. And this is just my opinion.. The only people that will have sex after 5-10 minutes of chatting are the guys with female avis (not all the guys may I add).

 

Wiazrd has made it plainly clear in other posts he isn't an advocate of friendships and relationships here. So if you are happy to have sex with just guys, follow his advice. If you would rather have sex with girls, make good friends etc.. listen to the rest of us :)

 

Macca is right :D

 

To be honest, I don't really bothered by the gender behind the avi, unless he/she can pretend perfectly that she is a girl ;)

 

But to be serious, i didn't mentioned in my post, that i go bed after 10 min, only that if there is no same wavelenght comes up in 10 minutes of conversation, the chance that it will come one hour chatting later is a bit low.

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Thank you for your post, I make a good point, however this has not been the case for me.

I am not here for love either.

I state that pretty clearly in my profile.

I would not dare to impose myself on anybody else for their time or whatever else.

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Macca,

Thank you for your advice.

For what is worth,(simulated) sex after 5 minutes chat could be fun, depending on the situation, but it is not really what I am talking about.

I would rather chat with somebody for 1 hours about sport cars, food, or the role of light and its the speed of light in the expanding universe and flirt along without any sexual content than talk for 2 seconds and go around trying all the available sex poses and not even remember the name of that player after 2 minutes.

 

Cheers!

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I totally agree with many of the comments here. 

 

In real life, do you dance, talk perhaps flirt with someone and suddenly you drop that person to see someone like that, without a word mean? I hope not !  :blink:

 

So yes, we are in a virtual world, you have to be careful, some will say "it's just" for fun, blah blah blah ... But a little honesty, respect and courtesy just never killed anyone. 

 

In fact, the feelings that we have here are not so different than what we may have in reality. It is important to think about that before you act because you can quickly hurt (even without intentions)  :(

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I sorta did this to someone last night. I was chatting with someone and my bestest friend turned up so i wanted to talk to her. I told the guy that i was sorry i really wanted to talk to this person and went back to talk to him after. I think that is the least you can do. Anything less is just rude.

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I try to treat people in game the same way I would if I was actually stood there talking to them.

 

Some exceptions as people don't normally walk up to me and try to drag me back to their place or just yoink me into a dance before speaking. Plus I've never yet disconnected from reality, (well not completely anyway) vanished and had to walk back to a conversation thankfully :)

 

To the question if the OP though, yeah def rude, as JanaX says, at least an "excuse me a sec just need to catch up with a friend" is surely all that's needed.

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I must have been lucky because most of the people I meet here are polite and don't run out on me when someone else comes in. At most they will excuse themselves before they bow out.

 

But I see it happen all the time when I'm chilling in Sin of in the club. I guess people do it because it's "only an online sex game".

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Happens all the time mate.. Just something you need to get used to.. 80% of people here don't give a monkeys ass about other people and what their actions can cause. The trick is to find the 20% that do.. :)

True...

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I have been thinking about this for a few days Freezer and how best to reply without typing out a full book as I struggle to convey things in just a few mere words.

 

As Macca said there are different kinds of people here. Some will chat to you out of courtesy and others will genuinely want to speak with you it is just more miss than hit on the Russian Roulette scale. It is unfortunate when you are speaking with somebody and they randomly change locations or just flat ignore you and speak to somebody else, however you get used to it and you develop a thicker skin. Please note I am NOT saying this is everyone so please put away the pitchforks. It has happened to all of us, however in the throng you always find somebody worth talking to.

 

I have had many a discussion with both sexes from a simple Hi that turned into amazing discussions of politics, economics, sexuality, life, love and many other topics and the fluidity with which they change is something to behold. Not all turn to flirting and it is not something I actively seek but if it does turn to flirting, so be it. I have lost hours talking, just like I lose hours with music :)

 

All I can say is that you will continue to have this experience and you just need to take the good with the bad. You will have some amazing, fulfilling conversations and you will have a few short ones that end with no word, just take them as they come, brush yourself off, and seek out the diamonds.

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My experience is exactly like MikeyZA says above, and I can add the following.

 

Meeting people, my personal etiquette (which has not been that successful I must admit! any suggestions for improvement?) is to say Hi to a girl to make the contact. Usually get a Hi back in response. I then leave it at that, so that I'm not being a pest to someone who does not want to chat. One time in twenty, maybe less, It progresses into an amazing conversation with a great person that can last for hours. And these rarely develop into anything further,which would be good though I don't push that.

 

I've said this before, I see that it is the guys (especially new guys) who have to work so hard to make relationships here, and get turned down so many times in the ways discussed above (personal experience) it could be disheartening. Though the very few times you find someone you have a connection with, makes it worthwhile. 

 

I reckon you could develop a "guys guide to flirting" from all the experiences here. What to do, and what not to do.

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Meeting people, my personal etiquette (which has not been that successful I must admit! any suggestions for improvement?) is to say Hi to a girl to make the contact. Usually get a Hi back in response. I then leave it at that, so that I'm not being a pest to someone who does not want to chat.

 

 

A lot of people, not just guys do this, and I personally don't understand it at all.

 

It might be ok in real life, where you have eye contact and body language to help you judge the other person's response. 

 

But here, all you have to go by is the text. So I never say just "hi" to a person I don't know. I always say "Hi, [name]. How are you today."  Or something similar. And I can usually tell by the response to that one question if they are open to chatting with me. Sometimes it takes one or two more questions to find out that they are busy or just not interested. But not a lot more.

 

I always use the person's name or a pet name when greeting my friends, too. 

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