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Edited highlights of a convo in rl

 

His NIbs: Have you been doing anything on the computers in my studio? (Note - he hates anybody going in there let alone using his computers)

Me: No, why (genuine all innocence here. Not that I'm averse to playing pranks on him when he stays in there longer than I think is strictly neccessary)

His Nibs: Take look at this (Showing me a picture of a tarty looking girl in decidedly dodgey underwear embedded in a website for keyboard players)

Me: .................................. (dissolves in to giggles)

His Nibs: So you have? You know that I need all this for work!

Me: You mean you need pictures of tarty women for work?

His Nibs: What if ............... (pauses here realising there's a potential elephant trap appearing in front of him)

Me: OMG you total pillock, you know I wouldn't but it is funny. I hope you're not buying me one of those for Christmas.

His Nibs: Why not?

Me ................... gives evil glare 'cos it's the sort of thing his ex would have worn, prolly still does for all I would know

 

 

 

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How dare you impugn the integrity of all men simply because you chose to marry a pillock!!

I was going to call you a "female chauvinist sow," but didn't want to cross the border between teasing and trolling without a passport.

 

Seriously, though, you think men are bad? Marry a woman; you'll soon understand what "equality of the sexes" really means. :P 

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Lmao, ace replies. With benefit if hindsight I think I might have been a bit cryptic.

 

Advice to men - If you want to buy your wife of girlfriend underwear for Christmas, don’t, yeah. Find something else. The consequences of getting it right are as awful as getting it wrong, especially seeing as most men can’t buy clothes for themselves unaided.

 

Do I need explain how much of a pillock somebody who doesn’t know what pollock is?

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/me makes mental note to not to do forum posts on either her iPad or phone

 

It's all pollacks anyway, or is it bollocks. OMG didn't Sainsbury's once try to call Pollack something like Colin (pronounced like General Colin Powell apparrently).

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tis bollocks.   ;)

 

14th Century (as 'ballocks') English term which has grown numerous useful applications within today's language: 1. Term of exasperation, often at having made a mistake. 2. As a plural noun, the bollocksare the testicles. 3. Exaggerated truth or blatant lies. 4. Unfathomable rubbish; corporate management speak, e.g. ...

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 1 month later...

I thought I'd pop this in here necause it is, sort of, on topic. A nice little story anyway. It comes out of something I said to a friend, completely without thinking, about blokes getting 'blokey boring' when they have a common interest.

 

My husband is a professional musican rl, my Dad a gifted amateur. With Dad being ill he's had to give up his music until he gets stronger, which pisses him off terribley - men of his generation and that. A few days after his chemo Dad always has a few really bad days when he can't really do much, so my husband and I do what we can to give my Step-Mum a break and to stop Dad trying to do stuff that is too much for him.

 

Today my husband has gone over to spend time with Dad. They get on really well and love each other's company so I visualise them listenning to music, swapping stories, musical ideas and stuff. Maybe going on and on until my Step-Mum gets home and turfs my husband out to come home. Hence 'blokey boring'.

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Thought Id add a nice story here...A few days ago.. my hot water heater busted.  At the time I didnt know that it was that, it could have been a water pipe.  I only knew that my room and bathroom were flooded. Of course my husband is out of town working at this time.  My awesome neighbor (Who is a single man) rushed over to  make sure I had shut off the water correctly. As Id never done it in this house before.  Hes not a plumber.. but unbeknownst to me he called another neighbor.  The very next day this second neighbor, a man that I dont even know very well, showed up at my house to plug it off so that I had water until my husband gets home.  Very awesome men, no on hit on me or tried to take advantage.  In fact they both did something that they had no obligation to do.  Just to help, because I needed it.  Just because they are nice people.. nice men. My son came over and wet vac'd the carpets.. and helped clean up.  I am surrounded by wonderful men, wonderful people.

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I hope your disaster wasn't one of those that runs in threes. Lilcal.

 

I thought I'd post another, with a different spin on it. Perhaps one that other people may like to participate in.

 

While I was working earlier this afternoon the scissor sisters song about taking your mama out tonight came on my iPod. The phrase about drinking cheap champagne made me start thinking.

 

Just before Christmas some friends, not close friends fortunately, came over and brought this bottle of champagne with them. It didn't get drunk because we had loads of booze that night anyway. When they'd gone his nibs googled up this champagne and discovered that a wine critic suggested 'cutting out the middle man and puring it down the drain'. His nibs said 'what are we going to do with this?', 'lets use it for luxury mojitos and invite X & Y over in the summer'. I said 'why not keep it until next Christmas and regift it back to them'. Not that I'd actually do it, mind.

 

So what would everybody else do?

 

Damn - thanks to a work interuption, it's my coffee break ffs!!!!, I forgot to say that the friends are a couple who really know their wine. What James May, of Top Gear fame, would call wine ponces.

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You never re-gift something someone gave you back to them while the comment showed poor taste on your part even if you wouldn't do it.  My first thought would have been who else might enjoy it that I know.  It's an outright insult nor do you give it to someone that is closer to them.  You give it to someone that you're an acquaintance of yourself that you know doesn't really know them, I would think that is common knowledge in today's world as it has been for many years.  They may not be that familiar with wines and selecting them and trust the person selling it to know more which in some cases they don't always know. I know a bit about wine and food parings from over the years and a teacher that I had that had taught me about them, took me to some tastings to help me understand the difference.  As they say with any gift it is the thought that counts.

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