Being Proud of Who and What I Am and My Choices

[Guest silverbackalphabull]

I will start off by saying this was originally posted in the About Me section in My forum profile, but I decided that this story didn't belong there it belongs here. In an effort not to hurt and humiliate certain people and groups I have left out names intentionally. I am not interested in starting some virtual war with anyone or any group or club, but if this makes people exit the game, cancel their subscription, swallow their anit-depressant medication, crawl in their beds under the covers in the fetal position crying themselves to sleep while sucking their thumbs I can honestly say the rest of 3dx will be better off and their enjoyment will increase tremendously without these people in the game. As I was enjoying Myself tonight I found out a handful of people ignored Me (I did not cold anyone in anyway) in game without knowing who and what I am or making any effort to speak to Me and find out for themselves out of some misguided and abused rules created but are only followed when it is convenient or suits their needs. This is okay because sooner or later as most in here have seen loyalties change like any other soap opera especially when they find out they were lied to and betrayed.

 

If you speak to Me in game or read future posts you will probably see this again. I don't suffer from false pretenses, play games, or deal in lies. I am who and what I am in real life and in the game. I do not pretend to be something I'm not. I make no excuses or apologize for who and what I am either, I'm proud of it and unlike some in here I'm proud to be a Man.

 

Over a month ago I met a girl with a slave's heart who came to Me needing something she had not found or was allowed to have since she joined in October 2105. W/we spent a great deal of time getting to know who and what each other are including O/our likes, dislikes and hard limits and consensually spent a our first meeting publicly in the Sin Club in the back room. She was extremely responsive to Me and when I was done, she sat back on her heels, crossed her wrists over her head, lowering her head between her arms and said, "I submit to you Master, please take Me as your slave". After a lengthy discussion she tilted her head back displaying her neck as the heavy steel collar snapped closed and was locked in placed, engraved with the inscription "Property of silverbackalphabull"...I accepted her submission. The following day however she was gone from My friend list, but I wasn't surprised or angry, I knew why she had left from her reading her profile the day before, she returned to who and what she knew.

 

On 29 June 2016, I saw her on the beach sitting alone, so I asked her if she was okay. We talked for quite some time again, she begged Me for My forgiveness and after using her for My pleasure for only the second time she submitted to Me once again willingly, wantingly and without question. I reminded her that I am selfish, possessive, a chauvinist and do not suffer from false pretenses, games and lies and that I am not here to pretend to be someone or something I'm not. I asked her repeatedly if this was her choice and was what she felt in her heart she wanted, she begged yes, but she wanted to hold onto her other life as well. I knew it wouldn't work but I agreed because what this slave girl is, has and offers is extremely rare, so being who and what I am I went along fully knowing what was about to happen at no fault of My own or hers. Needless to say it did not work out the way we talked about and as she hoped it would but everything I said would occur did. I again asked her what is your choice and she emphatically said, "You Master, You are my Choice", so for the second time the slave tilted her head back displaying her neck as the heavy steel collar snapped closed once again and was locked in placed, engraved with the inscription "Property of silverbackalphabull"...

 

Now, if you are ignorant to a lifestyle you're afraid of or do not understand do not judge it, DaniStar or Me. DaniStar willingly, wantingly, without question, without being coerced, forced, tricked, or threatened became My property, My rightless animal, My little white bitch in heat and My slave girl; body, mind and soul. She has told Me she is happier than she has ever been since she joined in October 2015 because she no longer had to pretend she was someone or something she is not or hide who and what she truly is. Girl's like her are not happy without a collar, Girl's like her beg to be feel her Master's whip against her flesh for no more than to remind her of who and what she is. I saw these qualities in her the first day we met and was surprised no one else had. I have seen these feelings and traits before, in the strongest and most proud women I have ever had the pleasure to meet; consensual slave girls and yes they exist and are very real normal people. Again, I will repeat, if you are ignorant to a lifestyle you're afraid of or do not understand do not judge it. No one can make these girls feel differently and the longer they are forced to suppress these feelings the stronger their desire becomes until they realize what they have is not what they truly want or need and will go seek it out until they find it especially if what they currently have or had is or was open with the freedom to seek out those that can fulfill these desires and needs.

 

I did not plan or expect to meet DaniStar. I did not seek her out she found and came to Me. There are always two sides to a story, on rare occasions and in this case there are three but I can only tell Mine and hers. There is another and as most will suspect that story will not look like Mine or hers. But know this, I am 50 years old and an honorably retired US Army vet of 22 years of active duty service and My honor cannot and will not be compromised by denial, anger, hate, pity, temper tantrums, crying, whining, yelling, depression, low self-esteem, weakness and failure. There is no fault and there is no blame in this. The way things transpired and happened started well before October 2015 by the choices that not only DaniStar and I made but by the choices of those who knew and know her and were closest to her most. DaniStar cares deeply for those who show her loyalty, trust and true friendship and now she has Me. I have accepted her gift of submission and she has chosen Me to be her friend, guide, lover, mentor, protector, teacher and more but most importantly her Master.

 

For those close to this situation I will ask this one time, before seeing only one side of a story, find out all sides before you judge Me or My slave out of ignorance that includes getting to know Me personally. After, if you have something negative to say about Me go ahead it will only show the control and power you give Me over you. What has happened in her life prior to our very first meeting is in the past so I don't care. Any thoughts of trying to get Me to feel negatively about her or disparaging her now is another story. I will defend and protect her as fiercely and vengefully as I do anything or anyone I feel are Mine from real life pets, to My suburban and My family and friends. DaniStar has been taught and told how to behave and speak to a free person and will refer them to Me if she is confronted negatively or if someone finds her displeasing. However, she has the freedom to claw the fucking eyes out of any pet, slave or sub that she feels threatened by. I don't get involved in the squabbles between bottoms (look it up if you don't no what a bottom is). If you don't believe in honor don't come to Me or DaniStar. If you do don't be intimidated by My profile here or in-game and introduce yourself but I expect to be treated with respect. I am approachable and willing to talk with anyone who wishes to about anything.

 

All positive replies, if any, will be shown appreciation. However, I'm sure someone will have something negative to say about this or Me, there is always some weak, thin skinned individual who cannot allow other people to feel, think and believe other than they do. Your negative opinions about Me and or My post will be treated as irrelevant as you are with no response. If you feel the need to do so please remember what I said two paragraphs ago, I am 50 years old and an honorably retired US Army vet of 22 years of active duty service and My honor cannot and will not be compromised by denial, anger, hate, pity, temper tantrums, crying, whining, yelling, depression, low self-esteem, weakness and failure. I may not agree with your choices but I will respect them as I expect Mine to be respected as well, except for one choice some have made in here I despise with every cell in My body.

 

No Matter what I wish E/everyone well and an excellent time.

 

[MikeyZA]

The lifestyle people choose, well... that is their choice and is not for us to judge, however as human nature goes people will judge anyway. They will judge either in secret or openly, and it's up to them how they choose to judge, and there is precious little you can do to stop judgement. Ignoring works both ways and if they choose to judge you, move on and leave them behind. Don't dwell on them.

 

What I will say, and this is not judging you but more your tone and tense, is that your comments seem to ask for confrontation in the way you openly but vaguely insult people and basically ask for a fight. You say there will be "x" type people that will be "y" and a sentence or two later talk about honor and how it or your sensibilities cannot be compromised. My 2 cents here is that your approach is all wrong, no matter what you did for your country, nor what your beliefs, sensibilities and traits are. You are basically asking for people who will take offense to your lifestyle, choices and of course, your insults, to "come at me bro" and knowing these forums, you are going to get it from some, so with the way you worded it, you can expect to get it back in kind. Not attacking you or what you say, just observing.

 

The second is that, even if this person submits to you, a REAL D/S relationship, and the ones I have personally observed and the people I know, do not have any such derogatory naming of a human being as "bitch in heat" or "rightness animal" etc. and a lot of people would take offense to this even if the person that submitted to you doesn't mind being degraded in this way. Unfortunately even in a game or the online world, human rights and dignity still apply and you as an honored member of your countries defense force should know that better than anybody as human rights and freedom is naturally something you believe in and fought to uphold. Pretty much the only thing I take offense to in your entire post is the way you refer to another human being in such a base and derogatory manner, and I am rather open minded and have no issues with a D/S relationship at all as, like I said, I know a few personally, I just take issue with the way you word it or do it.

 

Just my 2c. Have fun with your time in 3DX.

[Guest silverbackalphabull]

Mikey, I appreciate your honesty and being willing to share your thoughts. I don't find any of your post negative even I think you may have misunderstood the intent on things I conveyed except of course the intentional vagueness at the beginning of Mine.

 

I will elaborate to maybe clarify what I perceive as confusion or misunderstanding on your part since I did not feel it necessary to go into too much detail in some places. The only place I may have conveyed any type of willingness to confront anyone is when I was referring to DaniStar which I do not regret and obviously as I mentioned in that paragraph that was directed at certain people but only they know who they are and if they wish to come forward that is their choice, but as I said I will defend and protect as any true friend would even My responsibilities exceed friendship.

 

As far as the lifestyle goes and My choice of it all I said anywhere was if you don't understand it don't judge it or Me, but also anyone else who chooses to participate in it. There are many people who participate in the lifestyle they way they choose to but anyone who knows anything about the lifestyle also knows it is misunderstood on many levels of which I am not here to debate or spend the rest of My life trying to convince anyone to think as I do. My intent is to point out to a vanilla community that the people in this lifestyle are normal well adjusted people there is nothing wrong with them and their choices, desires, needs and wants may not be to their liking but because someone enjoys being degraded and humiliated, or bound and whipped, wishes to kneel and call someone Master or any other of countless fetishes does not give them any more right to judge or them just like people don't want to be judged for their race, creed, color, religion and nowadays especially sexual preference. Again, this is about choice nothing more and yes I would defend the lifestyle as a real choice for people, but I would not judge anyone for not wanted to participate in it. Ignorance is doing anything based on not knowing any better. I'm ignorant when it comes to many things that doesn't mean I believe those that are subject matter experts in those area are bad people just because I don't know anything about it.

 

You last point is special because again My perception is you are mixing two different cultures that obviously one would not except the other. I have participated in humanitarian and combat operations and have exactly supported those efforts and the men, women and children that needed that assistance, help and protection with My brothers and Sisters in arms.

 

As far as the lifestyle is concerned it has nothing to do with My military service although there a plenty of service members who participate in the lifestyle. You spoke about yourself and said, "the ones I have personally observed and the people I know". Those people you know may not participate in scenes I have but, no two D/M's and no two, pets, slaves or subs are alike and E/everyone has their likes, dislikes and limits. The trick is to find those that are compatible with yours and with My DaniStar, she and I have that. As a matter of fact there are many in this game that seek such treatment but do not think for one second I do not know how emotionally, mentally and physically exhausting and draining this lifestyle is or how to handle anyone with such needs. I know very well which role I need to be for whoever chooses Me and I allow to share this time with Me. If you or anyone else chooses to believe that DaniStar is not happy with who and what I am and how she is treated please feel free to ask her yourself because no matter who thinks or feels or believes what, her opinion is the only one whose opinion matters. This is exactly what I'm talking about what when I say do not judge what you do not know out of ignorance and I'm not directing this comment at you just in general. There have been some things in this game that I am offended by as well, but I don't say anything about it directing my opinion at those people as this is how they wish to enjoy the way they pay for their subscription as this is how DaniStar, Myself and others wish to enjoy ours. And hopefully people will understand in this lifestyle that a slave is a consensual slave. They are not kidnapped and forced into it unless that is what role-play two people wish to enjoy and there are many in here that do.

 

Anyway, I appreciate the conversation I also hope you enjoy yourself the way you pay your subscription for and have an excellent time.

[Guest ameliaUK]

Not judging anyone here - what people choose to do in their private lives is entirely up to them and really I doubt many people are overly bothered...  Which leads me to wonder why you even felt the need to post this?

 

Like Mikey says, you seem to be expecting and inviting criticism and even by raising it as a subject in a public forum it's like you want it to be seen and commented on, knowing that some of those comments may well be negative.

 

It's like 'Look at meeee'.

 

Just my thoughts.

[AnyNameWillDo]

I'd stop worrying if i were you. There's nothing particularly unique or startling about how you choose to engage in 3DX. I suspect there isn't one kink or quirk that hasn't been explored by others before you. Really, it's no big deal. Enjoy

[Guest silverbackalphabull]

Not judging anyone here - what people choose to do in their private lives is entirely up to them and really I doubt many people are overly bothered...  Which leads me to wonder why you even felt the need to post this?

 

Like Mikey says, you seem to be expecting and inviting criticism and even by raising it as a subject in a public forum it's like you want it to be seen and commented on, knowing that some of those comments may well be negative.

 

It's like 'Look at meeee'.

 

Just my thoughts.

The answer to your question is simple amelia, The user diaries are each persons personal diary (or blog) to post about our 3DXChat adventures, experiences, interesting meetings, discoveries, roleplay. A diary is a record, especially of the writer's own experiences, observations, feelings, attitudes, beliefs, etc. without worrying about other people's beliefs. sensitivities, feelings or opinions. If someone doesn't like what someone has to say or write about in their diary, unless of course it has to with serious issues like suicide or doing harm to others but not in a safe, sane, consensual way or a Risk-aware consensual kink, then it's My opinion since we're sharing they should just walk away since their opinion wasn't asked for or even cared about. As a grown up that's what I do. I'm not running for election or trying to build a fan base by any means as matter of fact just the opposite.

 

I'm not sure what subject you are referring to but My post is about what transpired with Me and DaniStar, but it seems people are focused on my thoughts, feelings, beliefs and opinions of everything other than the story itself. I have read other diaries and a great many to Me are filled with gibberish and nonsense, but it is their gibberish and nonsense and not My place to tell them so or give any specific individual My opinion and try to take away way how they wish to enjoy themselves when the pay their subscription fee to enjoy themselves the way they want. 

 

Then there are others who also like Me have told a story and gave their opinions, thoughts, feelings and beliefs and were criticized by some which is why I added the last paragraph in My post in the first place. No matter what I don't get angry over things like people's negative opinions, do wish they'd keep them to themselves of course I do. Do I prefer to hear positive remarks of course, if I don't get any I'm not losing any sleep over it either.

 

I'm sure I'm probably inviting more criticism by even sharing My reply to your post but it seems everyone's diary and profiles are a "It's like 'Look at meeee'." advertisement not just mine.

 

I wish you well and sincerely hope you have an excellent day.

[Guest silverbackalphabull]

I'd stop worrying if i were you. There's nothing particularly unique or startling about how you choose to engage in 3DX. I suspect there isn't one kink or quirk that hasn't been explored by others before you. Really, it's no big deal. Enjoy

 Brother ANWD, I'm not worried about any of this but I appreciate your post and will continue to enjoy myself. Have an excellent day.

[Guest ameliaUK]

 

Then there are others who also like Me have told a story and gave their opinions, thoughts, feelings and beliefs and were criticized by some which is why I added the last paragraph in My post in the first place. No matter what I don't get angry over things like people's negative opinions, do wish they'd keep them to themselves of course I do. Do I prefer to hear positive remarks of course, if I don't get any I'm not losing any sleep over it either.

 

 

Totally agree. Just as I believe what is private is private and shouldn't be shared with the world, equally those with negative thoughts need to keep them to themselves, at least so  long as people aren't getting hurt.