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Death Announcements


Shanti

  

181 members have voted

  1. 1. Do you agree to stop death announcements on this forum and lock the existing ones ?

    • Yes
      148
    • No
      33


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How is a poll a reminder? That would have been via a reference to the rules. A poll is asking people if they agree with one of the rules and implicitely therefore the action taken to remove one of threads that contravened the rules.

This is already in our rules, but seems you didn`t notice. This is a reminder about how it started and why most of us disagree with the death news.

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It clearly isn't a reminder. It is a poll asking if people agree with the rule and actions taken against threads that contravene a rule, and much of the discussion that follows, including my own contribution is apparently against the rules. Fair enough. As MeiLing has pointed out, it all contravenes rule 2.10.

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Don`t be lazy and try to read first comments. If you guys wanted to provoke this topic to be closed, a No. Here is a reminder, here is an opinion of most people in here and Why people are against "death news".

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If some comments are prohibited, developer can delete those comments and developer can close the poll.

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Clear?

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It clearly isn't a reminder. It is a poll asking if people agree with the rule and actions taken against threads that contravene a rule, and much of the discussion that follows, including my own contribution is apparently against the rules. Fair enough. As MeiLing has pointed out, it all contravenes rule 2.10.

You are wrong. There was no rule about it. People wanted it and old mod crated this poll. Was nothing against old rules.

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ps: too much edited in your comment,I should quote your posts all the time x3

Edited by ExHaran
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Well in that case, as it is not a forum rule but one decided by the forum community 4 years ago. It may not be relevent to the curent members here.Β  I feel it is time to do a revote.

Maybe the change in members since then, may not like this rule now.

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My views are simple,

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Everyone can grieve as they see fit,Β  private, public or with a few friends.

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I prefer in this case to use Forum to inform friends and colleagues past and present who people in the game presently, were not able to reach.

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Leopardus is correct, rather like a public announcement in a newspaper, we hoped to reach members who knew him.

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It worked, it reached at least 1 who had left the game - MikeyDee. He would not have otherwise if not fo Forum.

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What is wrong with that?Β  Nothing at all.

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I have also posted updates and tribute nights we are aranging to celebrate his life and birthday.Β  What is wrong with that?Β  Nothing at all.

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If you dont agree with public announcements, thats fine too,

If you dont agree with celebrating someones life, thats fine too,Β  There's nothing wrong with that either.

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What is wrong is...Β  Β 

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You are able just pass over the topics you dont agree with or dislike,Β  like I do.

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Let us who like to grieve like this do so... leave us be.

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Now, you have forced your views on me...

Now I cant read peoples tributes to my friend ;

Now I cant direct people to the topic who want to know what happened... it saved me repeating the sad news over and over.Β 

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Now I haven't got pics and conversations of funny stories involving our deceased friend that his friends had shared with us! The topic was deleted without warning.

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You have forced your views on me.Β  Β We havent broken any laws, any rules set down by the game.

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That is wrong.Β  Β 

Therefore I have voted NoΒ  in this pole.

No one should be able to tell me or my Wife, or my friends how I should grieve and how to show respects to my friend.

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I would never dare to tell you.

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Live and let live.Β  Vote No Folks!

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The problem with giving exceptions to the rule for β€œprominent people” is that soon the rule will becomes meaning less. I personally don’t want to see death announcements on the forum regardless of whether they are real or fake. Its sad hearing about them even if you never knew that person. Death is a private thing, and not something to be celebrated especially in a case like this where family members have no involvement. I don't think anyone really knows what he or they would want in the case of his death. I have already heard in the game that he died from two different causes pneumonia, and complication from an operation, so all types of rumors are being started about it. It feels like some people are trying to exploit his death to push their own viewpoints. There is a reason why in real life funerals are invitation only. I don’t see why people here cant follow that precedent instead of promoting public events.

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First of all, all that you heard was true. He had minor surgery on his foot.Β  Same da surgery.Β  A week later he was diagnosed with walking pneumonia.Β  A week later he was dead.Β  He was on all the proper meds.Β  So I don't understand the point you are trying to make. I can tell you that it was not rumor you heard but true FACT.Β  He contracted the pneumonia in the hospital.Β  His doctor told him it was going around.

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Exploit his death?Β  How exactly?Β  What does the grief of our loss benefit anyone?Β  Viewpoints?Β  smhΒ 

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Your coldness only indicates that I will never wish to be your friend.

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Hi ty,

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This is a discussion on the poll taken by a mod in 2015.Β 

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I believe times may have moved on 4 years later. What wasΒ relevant then, may not beΒ relevant now.

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I have asked for my topic to be reinstated.Β  I will not know till Monday and they contact me.

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In the meantime. I think the discussion is relevant and worthy of discussion.

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Well in that case, as it is not a forum rule but one decided by the forum community 2 years ago. It may not be relevent to the curent members here.Β  I feel it is time to do a revote.

Maybe the change in members since then, may not like this rule now.

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My views are simple,

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Everyone can grieve as they see fit,Β  private, public or with a few friends.

Β 

I prefer in this case to use Forum to inform friends and colleagues past and present who people in the game presently, were not able to reach.

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Leopardus is correct, rather like a public announcement in a newspaper, we hoped to reach members who knew him.

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What is wrong with that?Β  Nothing at all.

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I have also posted updates and tribute nights we are aranging to celebrate his life and birthday.Β  What is wrong with that?Β  Nothing at all.

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If you dont agree with public announcements, thats fine too,

If you dont agree with celebrating someones life, thats fine too,Β  There's nothing wrong with that either.

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What is wrong is...Β  Β 

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You are able just pass over the topics you dont agree with or dislike,Β  like I do.

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Let us who like to grieve like this do so... leave us be.

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Now, you have forced your views on me...

Now I cant read peoples tributes to my friend ;

Now I cant direct people to the topic who want to know what happened... it saved me repeating the sad news over and over.Β 

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Now I haven't got pics and conversations of funny stories involving our deceased friend that his friends had shared with us! The topic was deleted without warning.

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You have forced your views on me.Β  Β We havent broken any laws, any rules set down by the game.

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That is wrong.Β  Β 

Therefore I have voted NoΒ  in this pole.

No one should be able to tell me or my Wife, or my friends how I should grieve and how to show respects to my friend.

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I would never dare to tell you.

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Live and let live.Β  Vote No Folks!

When you started you subscribtion, you was agree with EULA. No one force you to anything. Most part of community voted. Most of us don`t want to see someone`s death news. Is it clear? So if you want our community to be SAD do this privately and don`t cry if you will be reported too many times. I don`t want to see this hell all the time at the place where I want to get a good mood, good emotions and some fun. Someones death is not aΒ  joke, guys. This is a serious thing.Β 

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So.. dont read the topics that contain death messages if that is your issue.

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Clearly, I dont read the same things into death you do. Most contain nice, kind words and a celebration of the persons life.Β Β 

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Although the death itself is sad, most contain nice stories, funny anecdotes and happy memories of that person.

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Most contain Nice pictures and a fitting tribute to that person.

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I dont recognise anything you have just described in death messages and tributes i have seen.

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The difference is though, you can just skip the topic and have the choice of not reading it.

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I do not have that courtesy, Where is my choice?

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If i understand it correctly... the rule is not in the 3dxchat terms of service.

This rule was decided 4 years ago by forum members where circumstances may have changed now.

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I think we should have a new vote.

4 years on, things may have changed.

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First of all, all that you heard was true. He had minor surgery on his foot.Β  Same da surgery.Β  A week later he was diagnosed with walking pneumonia.Β  A week later he was dead.Β  He was on all the proper meds.Β  So I don't understand the point you are trying to make. I can tell you that it was not rumor you heard but true FACT.Β  He contracted the pneumonia in the hospital.Β  His doctor told him it was going around.

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Exploit his death?Β  How exactly?Β  What does the grief of our loss benefit anyone?Β  Viewpoints?Β  smhΒ 

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Your coldness only indicates that I will never wish to be your friend.

Her coldness? Are you serious? Who the hell was runned the frickin brothel in a name of died person? How cold are you guys, to do this? Do you,guys, make a party in brothel when someone from your family or friends just was died?

I have a hope that this stupid fashion will never be a habbit.

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Her coldness? Are you serious? Who the hell was runned the frickin brothel in a name of died person? How cold are you guys, to do this? Do you,guys, make a party in brothel when someone from your family or friends just was died?

I have a hope that this stupid fashion will never be a habbit.

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Yes, I am serious.Β  Very serious.

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As for one of his friends having a tribute in a brothel, thanks for noticing.Β  If you knew him you would know he'd have loved it.Β  In fact the owners of said brothel were very good friends of his and he DJ'd there many times.Β  So you sure do judge quick with zero knowledge of facts

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You should be so lucky to have so many care enough to pay such a tribute to you.

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ExHaran, on 26 May 2019 - 7:57 PM, said:

Her coldness? Are you serious? Who the hell was runned the frickin brothel in a name of died person? How cold are you guys, to do this? Do you,guys, make a party in brothel when someone from your family or friends just was died?

I have a hope that this stupid fashion will never be a habbit.

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Clearly you do not know this person.

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He was a DJ and played and visited at this locaton many times.

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His friends ran the place and knew him well.Β  Β 

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He would have loved the idea and I'm sure wished he could have done the tunes himself.

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Did you visit the tribute?Β  Did you feel the love in the room for him?Β  Did you see the trouble the organisers went to to honour his memory?Β Β 

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Best keep the discussion to the topic on whether the Death annoucements should now be allowed in forum.

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So.. dont read the topics that contain death messages if that is your issue. /Don`t teach me what I should to do, while I do nothing prohibited.

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Clearly, I dont read the same things into death you do. Most contain nice, kind words and a celebration of the persons life.Β  /You don`t know what I think about death, so don`t be that fast in your conclusions.

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Although the death itself is sad, most contain nice stories, funny anecdotes and happy memories of that person. /Privately

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Most contain Nice pictures and a fitting tribute to that person. /and sex in a brothel

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I dont recognise anything you have just described in death messages ad tributes i have seen.

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The difference is though, you can just skip the topic and have the choice of not reading it.Β  / Skip your life if you still think that someones death is a party

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I do not have that courtesy, Where is my choice? / read EULA

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If i understand it correctly... the rule is not in the 3dxchat terms of service. /no, not correctly

This rule was decided 4 years ago by forum members where circumstances may have changed now. / a NO. Here is the same as it was 4 years ago, but you can try a new poll

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I think we should have a new vote. / do this, but this is not good and will nothing change, most of us are adult

4 years on, things have changed. / too many strings for one thought...

An answer inside your message^^^

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Clearly you do not know this person. / not important, we talking about death news. Unfortunately, people are die everyday.

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He was a DJ and played and visited at this locaton many times. /I knew him

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His friends ran the place and knew him well.Β  Β / I know

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He would have loved the idea and I'm sure wished he could have done the tunes himself. / you don`t know because he already died

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Did you visit the tribute?Β  Did you feel the love in the room for him?Β  Did you see the trouble the organisers went to to honour his memory?Β  /I glad you had such a nice party, just don`t post death news on public

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Best keep the discussion to the topic on whether the Death annoucements should now be allowed in forum. /TRY TO FIND ANY GAME WHERE THIS IS OK..and let us know. dont be so childish.

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Yes, I am serious.Β  Very serious.

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As for one of his friends having a tribute in a brothel, thanks for noticing.Β  If you knew him you would know he'd have loved it.Β  In fact the owners of said brothel were very good friends of his and he DJ'd there many times.Β  So you sure do judge quick with zero knowledge of facts

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You should be so lucky to have so many care enough to pay such a tribute to you.

I am so lucky I have a brain to do not trust in each news.

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But I do know,Β  you see.. we were good friends.

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As did the hosts, his best friends and his friends, hense the chosen tribute and location.

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You are bordering on being insultng and ofensive now, whether you intend to be so or not.

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I know of at least 2 Forums that allow Death anouncements and allow people to grieve as they think fit. It brings the community together in times like this and is a comfort to like minded people.

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Each to their own as they say, except in 3dxchat Forum it seems

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Yay You

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tenor.gif?itemid=7973299

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Back to topic I think now.Β 

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But I do know,Β  you see.. we were good friends. /I was reading, I dont know

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As did the hosts, his best friends and his friends, hense the chosen tribute and location.Β  / a min before death can chenges a lot. Just sayin

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You are bordering on being insultng and ofensive now, whether you intend to be so or not. / I am not, I dont want to insult. Not true. But I will say something later to make everything clear

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I know of at least 2 Forums that allow Death anouncements and allow people to grieve as they think fit. It brings the community together in times like this and is a comfort to like minded people. \ Wich forums? What is the game forums where this is not prohibited?

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Each to their own as they say, except in 3dxchat Forum it seems / I dont trust

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Yay You / same to you ;)

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Guys, I am not against you, or your friend. I knew him a little, he was ok. I didnt see anything bad from his side. But it seems you really new in this game and you can`t imagine what was happening in the past and what will happens if death news will not be prohibited. I`ll try to open your eyes, if you don`t mind. I`ll do this to make everything clear.
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It was 2014-15 year. Was everything fine, Gizmo said that we will get some animations, clothes every month,etc. Was nice... except one thing. Some group of people started to make death announcements, death news by making topics on our forum. From the first look it was kind,smooth(like yours), many people was bringing their condolences, they was so sorry to hear about someones death. But after a while, we got another one. And another one. I don't remember very well, but somehow these assholes were caught in a lie.Β 
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Today, those drama guys walking around us, making friends and spreads their tales privately. Seems making a bad mood for someone is fun. Now try to understand that if we break this rule, those storytalers will start to do the same.
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I hope you understand what a pandora's box Is. Don't try to open it.

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Have a good time.

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Exploit his death?Β  How exactly?Β  What does the grief of our loss benefit anyone?Β  Viewpoints?Β  smhΒ 

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Your coldness only indicates that I will never wish to be your friend.

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I am not sure how you can't see that having a sex party when a person dies is kind of gross, maybe we just have totally different viewpoints about it, but I find it kind of exploitative, and its starting to feel like people are trying to latch on to his fame to promote their room. I didn't know him. I also don't know you or your husband. We aren't friends now, and I am perfectly fine with that state of affairs, but trying to paint me as a bad person for stating my view just shows how your trying to control the narrative, and push your viewpoint. This thread isn't about his death, but your trying to use it to replace the deleted thread. I didn't post in any of those threads, or ask for them to be removed, since I do try to be respectful of peoples grief. The threads got deleted for a reason if you have a problem with it then its with the mods not me. Also, an obituary isn't like a forum post it exist only to inform, and is in its own section of the paper.

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Niblette.Β 

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I am not sure how you can't see that having a sex party when a person dies is kind of gross, maybe we just have totally different viewpoints about it, but I find it kind of exploitative, and its starting to feel like people are trying to latch on to his fame to promote their room. I didn't know him. I also don't know you or your husband. We aren't friends now, and I am perfectly fine with that state of affairs, but trying to paint me as a bad person for stating my view just shows how your trying to control the narrative, and push your viewpoint. This thread isn't about his death, but your trying to use it to replace the deleted thread. I didn't post in any of those threads, or ask for them to be removed, since I do try to be respectful of peoples grief. The threads got deleted for a reason if you have a problem with it then its with the mods not me. Also, an obituary isn't like a forum post it exist only to inform, and is in its own section of the paper.

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*****************

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Unbelievable.Β Β 

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LOL. It wasn't a sex party either. It was a tribute to his life. Good music, Happy memories and dancing.

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No one is trying to promote rooms. Thats ridiculous and so are the presumptions.

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Can we please keep it on topic about whether Death announcements should be allowed on forum or not!

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I personally dont think its stupid to remember someone who has passed.Β  Β 

In fact, it seems a fitting way to remember them online in the games forum as that is how we met ... online in the game and in forum.Β  Β But I respect other members views.

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Isnt it a shame though, that ours were not respected.

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Isnt it a shame that a topic of remembrance was removed, without notification, without due notice to save anything that may have been wished to keep.

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Isnt it a shame that even though the topic was in memory of another who gave so much of this community,

and was clearly headed in the subject heading, so it could not be mistaken for something else,

it could not be passed over by a member was not interested in the subject and could easily move on to the topic that did interest them.

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Isnt it a shame that there was an insistance for it to be removed, even a complaint possibly sent to support. God forbid the offence this topic has caused! And without one bad word being said.

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Well congratulations... you succeeded.Β  The topic has been removed & deleted from forum.Β  Β Well done you.Β 

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Standing ovation to all the members who objected to a topic celebrating an online life of a member...and who was not able to just .... move on to the next topic.Β Β 

And dont forget, this passing was not a sick hoax, this was confiirmed by 3 independant members and the local police force.

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Yay you!!!Β  Β 

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tenor.gif?itemid=7973299

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How can you say you respect other members views.

In fact you are being insistent that others should respect your view over everyone elsesΒ 

Shanti created this thread because there were so many threads being posted about deaths, lots of which later were shown to be lies.

I don't know if this one is true or not and that is the problem, we have no way of knowing for sure on any of these death threads.

You say it has been verified by 3 people and a police report, but what you need to realise is that it can still be lies, I don't know those 3 people, and even if I did there is no way I could guarantee what they said is true, I haven't seen any police report.

What makes you feel you have the right to decide if this one is ok or not, who do you think you are, what puts you above everyone else in the forum that you feel should allow you to do what the majority have so clearly shown is not wanted.

Funny how you are now saying that people can just choose not to read when your view on that was completely the opposite when it suited you not to long ago.

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Twiggy

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How can you say you respect other members views.

In fact you are being insistent that others should respect your view over everyone elses

Shanti created this thread because there were so many threads being posted about deaths, lots of which later were shown to be lies.

I don't know if this one is true or not and that is the problem, we have no way of knowing for sure on any of these death threads.

You say it has been verified by 3 people and a police report, but what you need to realise is that it can still be lies, I don't know those 3 people, and even if I did there is no way I could guarantee what they said is true, I haven't seen any police report.

What makes you feel you have the right to decide if this one is ok or not, who do you think you are, what puts you above everyone else in the forum that you feel should allow you to do what the majority have so clearly shown is not wanted.

Funny how you are now saying that people can just choose not to read when your view on that was completely the opposite when it suited you not to long ago.

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************************************************************

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Thank you for your comments.

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Yes I have asked my views be respected as I respect yours. I am not forcing my views on anyone, in fact it is the reverse.

A decision made by members 4 years ago was forced on me when circumstances were very different.

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You have a choice. You can ignore or skip over a topic you dont like. Regular Forum users do it all the time.

My choice has been taken away. I can no longer update members who know him on things or share condolences. I cant read nor post in a topic that paid tribute to him.

There was nothing nasty, unpleasant nor derogatory said at all.Β  In fact nothing against 3dxchat rules. It was a nice respectful topic.

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4 years on from the decision taken here, there are now new members on forum.Β  Others have left , others have joined.Β  What may have been good reasons then, may have changed now.

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Read up, I was not aware of this debate nor the decisions or why death announcements were a touchy subject until after i posted my topic.Β Β 

I posted saying this as it was before my time.

The last post here was Oct 2015Β  until a member dug it out the archives to make a point.

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I also explained in the same post why I had posted and why I thought it relevant.

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I am not going to argue whether my friends demise is true or not. It's quite callous and I wont be drawn into that.

I'll tell you in private if you really wish to know.Β 

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As a general point though I do understand it and have met dickheads who have played sick role playing of dying, having a terminal illnesses etc... and do not condone that silliness.

If proved on the balance of probabilities then they should be banned from forum for life or the game for all i care.

Their credibility would be shot and any views after not worth an ounce of salt.Β 

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That being said though, every case should be judged on its merit.

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Members should have a choice how they grieve or remember people as long as its respectful and not insulting or against TOS,

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Other members bad behaviours in the past have been dealt with by the Mods at the time presumably.Β 

Four years on, others are then penalised for their bad behaviour?

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I will argue I have a right to post as long as its not derogatory or insulting to anyone.Β 

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There have been a lot worst topics here and there is nothing wrong with the content of the topic in question if dealt with respectfully, The title clearly states what it is so can easily be skipped ove rfor anyone who did not like this type of topic or is opposed to them.

In fact, maybe a separate section can be made so opposing members can skip completely.

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